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The Wedding Gift Etiquette Guide
Is cash OK? How much should I spend? How to handle common gift-giving quandaries.
Friends CANNOT be measure by the amount of money they will contribute at the weddings.
This isn't right... My husband and I had 130 people at our wedding... did we care of anyone bringing gits??? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! what was important to us, on the other hand, was to know that they were THERE celebrating this big day. Isn't that suppose to be this way?????
For all of those ladies that have the audacity to COUNT who gave what at their receptions: It is very wrong!!!! and your marriages are going to be base under the same structure, if is it not already.... then, think what is coming next.
I loved the very thoughtful gifts that we received, but it also helped to get the $$$ to pay off some of those bills after the big day. My friends say 'at least pay for your plate', but I understand everyone can't do that, and shouldn't be obligated to do so.
To the person who said they 'wouldn't count the gifts' -- are you kidding??? I kept a list of who gave what and use that to this day to give back to them or other family members. I guess all the differences are chalked up to location, location, location...
Fanguard, it is very odd to write thank you notes to people that didn't bring a gift. As it is customary to write a thank you note for what ever gift was given and for there attendance at the wedding.
Vereen1 I agree with your anger over the NO Shows. One of our friends said, Oh we forgot. With no apology!
$200 a couple for casual relations, $250/$300 a couple close friends, 1st cousins, $500 to $1,000 a couple for brothers/sisters. Cash is king. If you insist on a boxed gift make sure it is something they want/need and include a gift receipt.
What if I can't afford to go?
Don't go, pick a nice inexpensive gift & have it shipped with your reason for not attending.
Should the amount I give depend on the price per dinner plate?
Yes. If it is a modest place. If you are a $200k earner it would silly to have your 24 year old neice cover your plate. Also if a couple with cash picked the cheapest dumpiest place don't reward them by giving them the same gift you gave at a great wedding.
If I can't make it to the wedding, do I still give a gift?
Yes. but if person knew you could not make it and invited you to get a gift, just send them a card.
If I was your son's friend, I would reconsider whether to be his friend, not the other way around!
They were extremely hurt that over 60 of the 170 people that showed up didn't give a wedding presents, including close family, and wedding party members.
They thought these people were close friends. Now they reconsidering their relationships.
Let's not go into the costs of the no shows.
Being hurt by your so-called friends and family on the biggest day of your life really sucks.
The Wedding Gift Etiquette Guide http://bit.ly/13flfP
Sad. Some of these comments are turning this blog into a real joke.
okay you see I get my theraphy when no one pesters me...! http://www.alighthouse.com/wed12.html
LMAO
What happened to today's seemingly ordinary blog,Dr.Dish? It didnt just take a left turn...it left outer space, and encountered a black hole.
I am happy not to be invited...the stress having to get my son to church...then I rush to thier apartment for picture but they didn't even take any..then my son was hungry I tell you..long story of wedding.. then my other brother got married I got stuck in some dark field fog.....at least my wedding was simple didn't drive anybody crazy! SO THEY WONDER I STAY AWAY!
oh now I remember my sister in law had shower ....so I made a basket gift ...laundry basket full of bathroom things....then I gave my brother $150.00..then I had to pay for my son's suit ..he was the ring bearer..yes sometimes yopu give present it is nto what they want..so you are better off not to be invited and waste my time.
Sittinginlimbo: is it lingerie you can use as sling gun..omg!
after two kids I sell that naughty gift ebay..omg funny! yes or I tell my husbnad give me money screw your naughty gift I got better things to do than please your butt!
okay you tell me what kind of naughty gift? yes..I am nosy you know!
I am not in manic phase I am busy doing my face book in between I read the blog ....then my son bothers me so I have to stop on and off..I GOT A LIFE PEOPLE!...
yes I am the one stuck always going to wedding...this time I am glad I train my son to just be practical with his money .. if someday he plans to have a wedding no big wedding...just few people.
yes@Sittinginlimbo you should have given her tons of ziplocs she will use that for sure...lol..omg ....! when my brother got married I gave him money in his pocket $150.00 ( HE WAS TOO DRUNK) ..then he said I didn't give him money ..I am very tackful..I got nothing from him since I don't ask for any money. When he got married I had to pay for my sons outfit to be his ring bearer and they didn't even take the time to take a picture of my son....good thing I went to Sears for photo shoot for my son.... !
yes@Sittinginlimbo I learn not to waste my money..."gifts" my foot I say! yes ask her if she sold your gift at ebay..omg funny!
if you are in pain @ jhmcn you better save you rmoney instead of paying for the brides wedding gift.
@Rosette too funny You know I just thought of something. It was couple years ago I went to my husband's cousin bridal shower, and the gifts people gave her was all like tupperware, kitchen things. I was the only one who brought her a naughty gift. While she was opening all the gifts I was thinking shouldn't those gifts (tupperwares) be given at the wedding reception? When it came to my gift she started blushing. I went to Suzie's (need I say more? lol). She was so shame! Let's just say she's been married for 4 or 5 years now and she still hasn't open the "honeymooners" box YET! I spent a good deal of money on that crap! Till this day I still ask her did you use it yet, she laughs and tells me NO. I tell her UGH mary give it to me then I'll use it!
I didn't ask for gifts but they gave me towles and bed sheets.
I don't think I want any money from anybody I make sure I can afford my one hundred dollar wedding.
for fifty bucks my wedding is half way paid ..no debt with that!
I am sorry money is tight you lucky you see 50 bucks from me! lol
well good thing with my hundred dollars wedding I didn't have to ask for money from anybody!
yes with so much people unemployed who can afford to get married..then your luck you get a sex offender minister to marry you then next the guy don't show up....SO KEEP YOUR MONEY !
http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/World-News/US-Sex-Offenders-Sent-Down-To-Live-In-The-Woods-In-Georgia/Article/200909415394766?lpos=World_News_First_World_News_Article_Teaser_Region_2&lid=ARTICLE_15394766_US_Sex_Offenders_Sent_Down_To_Live_In_The_Woods_In_Georgia US Sex Offenders Living In Woods In Georgia ...one guy lives in a tent so the other guy decide to join the church....so go ahead get married !
Unemployment, furloughs and pay cuts are on the rise. The days of $300 wedding gifts are soon to be a distant memory.
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS as the guy that will marry a couple ....you worry about the gift how about this minister here. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33090795/ns/us_news-life//
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I've currently left my career to care for aging parents. The medical bills on top of no income are really intense. My entire life savings is dwindling, and these gainfully employed young family members (who have never sent me a card or gift in my life) want money from ME? It doesn't seem right - at all.
I think couples throwing lavish weddings need to understand that for some people, hiring help for a night out PLUS $50+ for a "gift" really HURTS, or is impossible/irresponsible. Couples throwing these events should consider their guest's situations and not be so self-centered and greedy, or expect their supposed "guests" to foot the bill for something the guests did not plan, instigate or choose. If you can't afford a lavish wedding, ...(Read more of this comment)