6 Big Companies That Cost Less Than Homes

Imagine being able to buy a well-known company with billions of dollars in yearly sales for less than the price of a home. It’s possible today, believe it or not.

Before I name examples, some caveats. By “home” I mean the top end of the nation’s housing market, not one of those $12,000 three-bedroom Detroit bungalows (at least, not yet). In Manhattan, the average apartment sells even today for what opulence fetches elsewhere -- around $1.6 million. Truly luxurious spaces, as you’ll see in a moment, command $30 million and up (although Barron’s predicts big price declines in coming months).

Also, this is more an exercise in morbid curiosity than a search for stock bargains. Clearly, a company with giant sales and a price below $30 million has deep problems, like a failure to turn profits, a crippling debt load, sales that look likely to plunge or all three. Marvel at the low prices, but leave the shares alone.

Let’s start with a newly finished, 8,000-square-foot glass penthouse atop a converted loft building in Tribeca. An undisclosed buyer signed a $30 million contract on the place in August 2008, and recently managed to come up with the full agreed-upon price. (Must not work in high finance.)

That’s $6 million more than you’d need right now to buy Six Flags (SIX). Founded in 1961, the company has theme parks in 10 American states, plus ones in Montreal and Mexico City. This year it’s expected to ring up just over $1 billion in sales. Plus, if you’re an animal lover, or you just want to play one heck of a prank on the neighbors, I’m pretty sure the deal gets you access to lions, giraffes and elephants at the company’s safari parks in California and New Jersey. The scariest ride at the parks, unfortunately, might be Debt Mountian; Six Flags owes about $2 billion.

Late socialite Brooke Astor owned a posh, 14-bedroom Park Avenue apartment that has recently been marked down to $36 million from its original asking price of $46 million, according to Barron’s. (I know: At that price you might need a roommate.) But if you have $36 million and just want plenty of rooms, why not rescue Sunrise Senior Living (SRZ) from possible bankruptcy? Current price: $17 million. The company sleeps 54,000. Sales this year should top $1.7 billion and debt totals at just over $600 million. Profits are, well, nonexistent. But you’ll have $19 million left over from your $36 million.

That’s enough to spring for either Pier 1 Imports (PIR), at $18 million, or Eddie Bauer Holdings (EBHI), at $15 million.

And while I can’t come anywhere close to that Detroit bungalow’s price with a big company, I’m afraid some big companies fetch far less than these at the moment. Phoenix-based Mesa Air Group (MESA), with a fleet of more than 150 aircraft and flights to 39 states, sells for less than $5 million, if you want to tackle its more than $500 million in debt. And Monaco Coach (MNC), which makes busses and recreational vehicles and as recently as 2007 recorded more than $1.2 billion in sales, can be had for less than $2 million at the moment. Debt stands at about $75 million.

On Monday Monaco laid off what was left of its work force out of concern it won’t find needed financing or a buyer.