Updated and adapted from the book, "1,001 Things They Won't Tell You: An Insider's Guide to Spending, Saving, and Living Wisely," by Jonathan Dahl and the editors of SmartMoney.

1. Sure, we're licensed, but that doesn't mean we're any good.

Over 80 percent of four-year-olds go to preschool these days a big switch from 1990, when only 65 percent of them did, according to the National Institute for Early Education Research (NIEER). More working mothers and a wide acceptance of the benefits of early education have fostered the growth of preschools. But there's a downside: Overall, the quality of preschools needs considerable improvement, says Steve Barnett, director of NIEER.

One reason is that most state licensing requirements pertain to safety and health rather than quality. That means a school might take extra care to make sure the toilet bowl plunger isn't within a toddler's reach, but it might not require its teachers to have much education. In fact, some states don't require any academic degree to become a preschool teacher. So how do you find a good preschool for your toddler? One indicator of quality is whether a facility has received accreditation from an outside organization. The largest accrediting body for preschools is the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC). To find information on that group's requirements as well as a locator for accredited preschools, visit its web site at www.naeyc.org.

2. Bus drivers make more than our teachers.

The most pressing problem for preschools is hiring and keeping good teachers--and it's little wonder why. The average annual salary for a preschool teacher is $26,610, less than what a bus driver or a concierge makes, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. The low pay is often reflected in the both the quality of the teachers hired and in staff retention. According to NAEYC, average teacher turnover at preschools is at least 30 percent annually.

How can a parent tell if a teacher is a modern-day Mister Rogers? In addition to looking for college degrees in early childhood development and years of experience, parents should observe teachers at work. One important factor is teacher to student ratio. NAEYC recommends one teacher for every nine three-year-olds.

3. Learning the ABC s won't prepare your tot for kindergarten.

Preschool used to be solely about sandboxes and finger painting. But more standardized testing in elementary schools, as well as anxious parents who think that learning the alphabet by age four will pave their tot's way to the Ivy League, has pushed academic preparation over more traditional kids' stuff. Today in preschools, in-class worksheets and memorization of letters and numbers, for example, are not uncommon. At the end of the day, however, preschoolers may not need as much academics as some parents might think. In fact, education experts say that overemphasizing academics at such an early stage can actually hamper a child's emotional and social development.

The skills kindergarten teachers are really looking for are those that enable academic learning, such as following directions or sitting attentively during story time. In light of that,parents should seek out a preschool that integrates the ABCs into playtime and encourages activities that engage the senses and emotions, which is how children learn best. A project that includes making lemonade, for example, could also involve lessons about measuring and counting.

4. Discipline's not our forte.

When it comes to discipline, preschools differ dramatically in their approaches, ranging from New Agey time-outs to old-fashioned verbal reprimands, like Stop running! One preschool even brands tots with a red sticker if they've had too many outbursts. Ultimately, a child's cognitive and social development is best encouraged through collaboration, discussion, and discovering the hows and whys of their actions, according to the National Association of Elementary School Principals. In other words, discipline is another opportunity to teach if teachers and schools are willing to put in the necessary time it takes.

For starters, discipline methods need to take into account a child's developmental needs. For example, Braun says that even benign time-outs miss the boat for preschoolers who aren't old enough to contemplate the rights and wrongs of their behavior. A better approach is to stop inappropriate behavior and help the child understand why it was wrong by talking with him about his actions.

Parents should ask preschool directors and teachers if they have a written policy regarding discipline and inquire about what training the school provides its teachers to help implement it. Untrained teachers may simply fall back on the discipline techniques they experienced as children.

5. Separation anxiety? Never gave it much thought.

For many toddlers and parents, one of the most significant experiences of preschool is being apart from each other. Yet for some schools, how children and parents separate isn't enough of a priority. If separation from mom or dad isn't handled thoughtfully, children may act out, regressing in their toilet training or clinging to parents back at home. But there are ways to help smooth the transition. Resurrection Preschool in Oak Forest, Ill., for example, hosts an orientation day where kids, parents and teachers are introduced to each other in the classroom setting. This helps ease the transition from home to preschool, and on the first day of school, children are more likely to view the teacher as a familiar figure.

6. Get ready to work overtime.

Many cash- and staff-strapped preschools not only welcome parental involvement, they require it. Parents are often prodded to lend a hand, which can mean everything from making snacks for 30 kids at a time to trimming the bushes outside the school's gates. Some preschools go even further, charging a nominal fee, say $100, for parents who want to opt out of bake sales and other extracurricular activities.

But some parental involvement at a preschool is far preferable to the alternative none at all. If a preschool doesn't have an open-door policy for parents to drop in and visit their kids, many experts say you should seriously wonder why. And watch out for ruses: It is possible for a school to schedule a full staff during the morning, when parents dropped kids off, but then let most of the staff go, deeply depleting the ratio of teachers to toddlers.

At the very least, preschools should have a system that enables and promotes communication from parents, whether it's calls to the director or tacking suggestions on a message board. And if schools don't require any parental effort, they should welcome it when it's offered.

7. We serve more junk food than McDonald's.

Back in the day, what kids ate in preschool didn't tend to register very high on the list of parental concerns. But with childhood obesity rising and growing concern over the prevalence of food allergies like peanuts, many parents are easing up on the peanut butter cups and cheese curls at home even as many preschools continue to serve up plenty of junk food. Despite federal and state nutrition guidelines that require balanced meals, treats like cookies, pretzels, Popsicles, and sugar-coated cereals are still standard snack-time fare at many places.

But more and more preschools are beginning to heed the call for healthy eating and impose nutrition guidelines and snacking policies. Little Village Nursery School in Los Angeles, for example, has a no-dessert rule for its snacks. At other places, special dietary requests from parents will be honored. If a preschool won't meet individual students' needs, then education experts say it should at least address allergy concerns. That means forbidding peanut butter and keeping toddlers from sharing their homemade treats.

8. We're harder to get into than Harvard.

These days getting your child admitted into a preschool of your choice can be as difficult as getting him or her into an elite college and that's true whether you live in a big city or not. In urban centers such as Los Angeles and New York, proactive new parents put their newborns on preschool waiting lists. But even in smaller cities and suburbs, the competition for enrollment has gotten tough.

Just how do preschools decide who gets in and who doesn't? Much of the time, it's the luck of the draw. But many preschools are also known to give preference to families with a sibling who's attended or to families who pony up big donations. And if a preschool is run by a church or a synagogue, members may also get a leg up.

There are sometimes other considerations as well. Since preschools strive to balance their classrooms, a child's gender and even temperament can affect admission. Many preschools want diversity, so race and religion could also play a role. Of course, whom you know counts, too.

9. Our pricey tuition is just the start.

Preschool tuition now costs as much as college tuition in many places across America. But the bigger sticker shock is that tuition is just the start of the money drain.

The number of children a preschool can accept is constrained by the number it can physically accommodate, so revenue growth is limited but the costs of running the school aren't. Despite low teacher salaries, a significant amount of money a preschool takes in possibly as much as 55 cents of every dollar goes toward labor, taxes, and insurance costs, such as workers' compensation. Aggressive fund-raising often fills in the gap, with as much as 20 percent of a preschool's budget coming from annual galas or auctions. In addition, many preschools actively solicit parents for cash donations as well.

For families on a budget, the finances of preschool can leave them with few options. Some schools offer scholarships; there are also cooperative preschools run by parents.

10. We don't always follow our own education philosophy.

Most preschools profess to have a guiding philosophy. Some follow specific theories espoused by education pioneers like Maria Montessori. Others buy materials and curriculum plans from education companies. But while they may have a plan on paper, many preschools may not follow it in practice. And while accreditation does offer some guarantee that schools will stick to their program, even that isn't airtight. NAEYC, for example, accredits schools on a rolling basis, leaving room for slippage.

To make sure their kids' preschool is staying on track, parents should check in on the classroom from time to time, paying attention to how it looks and feels. Spaces should feel welcoming and be designed for children: Artwork should be hung low, for example, where little ones can readily view it. And if the watercolor clowns all look the same, it may mean the teacher has done more of the art than Tommy's inner Picasso. NIEER's Barnett says parents should also check what the daily lesson plans are and whether they include activities their child enjoys. Bottom line: The biggest indicator of whether a preschool is working is if both the child and the parent feel good when they go there.